Day 41

I ended the evening with my daughter in the living room. No phones, no television, no music. Just the soft static and sighs of a house settling in for the night with its people.

I held the moment with her as long as I could. Laughing like twelve year old girls. Where purity and presence in silliness is downright sacred. A private clubhouse filled with no expectations. No bras allowed. I’m not 45 and she’s not 21; we are just us and we love each other.

It’s the second time today I realized how truly god-like we are as humans and our superpower is language. I’m talking magic and miracles, touch and be healed, kind of power and it’s deployed in our voice.

Power that can literally alter the course of another person’s life.

It happened to me at 8:47 this morning when a classmate from high school messaged me much needed words of encouragement. Just an unexpected little spill of kindness that pooled in my chest and spread like a sunrise.

One moment I was an employee bracing for the day and the next I was the me that God made.

Joy Novak if you’re reading this, you should know you did that today.

I suppose I just feel that it is every bit as important to acknowledge love as it is to give it. Maybe our superpowers multiply when we use them together.

Good Lord, I need to go to bed or at least try. I had to write and I will every day. It is a commitment I have made to myself and I’m not going to break it.

I’ve dreaded even thinking the words “this time it will be different,” much less saying it out loud. But you know what, this time won’t be different than all the other times I’ve tried to stay sober.

This time I will be different.

I will.


Sobriety Poet

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  8 comments for “Day 41

  1. Keri
    April 20, 2021 at 1:30 pm

    I needed to read this, this morning.
    I love you cousin.

    Liked by 1 person

    • April 20, 2021 at 3:01 pm

      I love you back! Thank you for being here with me in this!


  2. April 26, 2021 at 2:00 am

    Beautiful writing 💗

    Liked by 1 person

    • April 26, 2021 at 2:08 am

      Thank you for sharing your time with me here. It means so much. You are a lighthouse. It may sound silly to say, and maybe a bit dramatic, but oh well. I am both of those things at times. But I mean it. I have taken for granted how badly I need other human beings to make recovery work. To make LIFE work. Blessings my friend. Thanks again!

      Liked by 1 person

      • April 27, 2021 at 12:44 am

        Amazing to hear that… I’d long been trying to build a metaphorical lighthouse. Feeling I’ve failed at it in many ways. What a lovely comment. And absolutely, hey — we need a higher power for sure, and community can be a version of it or what makes it possible. I couldn’t have gotten as far as I did before without the kind folks who supported my blog. Thanks so much for being one of those lately… and for this lovely reply. And your writing really is beautiful. Hugs and love and blessings to you as well. :))) Xoxo

        Liked by 1 person

  3. April 30, 2021 at 9:24 am

    Wow, well done to you. That’s amazing! No, scrub that! You’re amazing 🙂 Big hugs to you on this lovely sunny day in London x

    Liked by 1 person

    • April 30, 2021 at 1:28 pm

      Well you just made my day! 🥰 Big hugs right back to you! Thank you for taking time out of your day to spread that sunshine, my friend. Be well. 😊 XO

      Liked by 1 person

      • May 1, 2021 at 10:02 pm

        🥰 Looking forward to following your journey 🙂 🥰


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